bdsm

Practising submission – What everyone needs to know about BDSM

A few decades ago, sexual practices often referred to people who tried unconventional sex as perverts. Over time, sexologists have revised their views on intimacy. In the 21st century, coarseness during sex is tolerated.

Deciphering the acronym for BDSM

The word is deciphered based on the application of practiced actions:

  • “B” translates to bandage
  • “DS” – dominance and submission
  • “M” is masochistic.

Based on these transcripts, it is clear that this practice involves inflicting pain, involves total submission, on the part of the oppressed.

Psychologists’ views on masochism

So whether or not this behaviour is considered an aberration is a concern for people. According to a study carried out by Pamela Connolly in 2006, it became clear that people who actively practise BDSM are not much more likely to suffer from depression. People do not develop feelings of anxiety and worry. Dissatisfaction with the state of life is not as common as for people who practise regular sex. But, ego and personality disorders affect BDSM enthusiasts far more often than ordinary people.

According to the International Classification, BDSM is on the list of illnesses commonly classified as mental disorders. However, scientists of the 21st century are increasingly making claims that people who practice these skills do not suffer from mental illness. And scientific work carried out by Pamela Connelly confirms this fact.

Relatively recently, scholars have come to the conclusion that it is incorrect to consider BDSM as a sexual deviation. Rather, it reflects a person’s attitude and particular sexual identity. One should not associate a person who engages in this kind of sex with a victim of violence.

In the study group, a cheerful attitude towards life and an active attitude were identified. These people have a greater sense of compassion for their partner, are extroverted and ready for new achievements and discoveries. Narcissism and lack of concession-making skills are indicators of negative characteristics that exceeded the norm for dominants.

But even such data does not give a basis for assuming that BDSM brings manifestation of mental pathology and personality disorder. It does not matter what consequences follow, what matters is what partners put into it and what kind of aftertaste it leaves on its participants. If it makes people happy and open to life, there is no need to be restricted in this.

The benefits of having non-traditional sex

People who do not restrict their sexual fantasies are less susceptible to psychological stress, cortisol levels in the blood are high. They have no problems with sexual arousal, in life, there is a predominantly good mood. Although during this kind of sex the participants are immersed in a different state of consciousness, the feelings of the dominant and the sub-missive are profoundly different.

Dominants feel completely merged into the activity process, losing control of their own self-consciousness. The feeling of flow in which the dominant stays has been described by psychologist M. Csikszentmihaii. The sub-missive, on the other hand, is characterised by complete relaxation and enjoyment of the process.

They are peaceful in the process and feel pleasure in life in the moment of the process. The state that people experience during sex is commonly referred to as topspace and sub-space. This is the conclusion reached by B. Sagarin in his article for The Guardian.

Is it necessary to engage in masochism?

The description of the pleasures received attracts a large number of people to start practising it for the first time, but in business the person practising it for the first time may not enjoy it properly and may even be disappointed. However, when is it worth starting?

It is worth taking up the whip with the understanding that people who enjoy it have been practising it for quite some time, and the positive effect they get from the degree of interest they have. For those who have no desire and no degree of involvement in the outcome, BDSM will have no positive effect.

The actions may seem rude and violent. Another thing is if one has been hatching the idea for a long period of time and fantasises about it. Then it is worth pursuing one’s thoughts without fearing for the result.

Newcomers should start with simple activities to see if they are interested and worth moving on, refining their role-playing. This step-by-step progression helps to avoid violence and mental trauma, which is very important for the submissive partner. It is the key to a trusting relationship that determines whether or not one enjoys the practice of BDSM.

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